Conquering the Morning After, One Bite at a Time

In honor of the New Year, this post is dedicated to January 1st’s international ailment: the hangover.

Different countries tout various remedies; Vietnam relies on the noodle soup known as pho, while Mexico swears by its tripe stew called menudo. To each his own, but personally the thought of choking down sheep’s stomach first thing in the morning is far from appetizing.

There appears to be a consensus in America, however, that carbs, grease, and breakfast fare are all excellent choices for the morning after- the larger the quantity, the better. A towering stack of fluffy pancakes drenched in sticky syrup and slathered with melted butter; a steaming bowl of silky fettuccini tossed in an unctuous Alfredo cream; a chargrilled burger dripping with meaty juice, topped with thick-cut bacon still sizzling from the griddle; all are strong contenders in battling the morning-after blues.

Nevertheless, sometimes while hung over it just isn’t possible to cook a gourmet meal, let alone leave the house. On such desperate occasions, before you reach for the ramen, consider the following recipe. Not only does it combine the grease, carb, and breakfast elements, but it also utilizes ingredients you should already have on hand. Even better, the dish takes minimal effort, so you’ll be nestled back in bed in no time.

Cook’s note: I have not included a picture with this recipe for the simple fact that it is not a pretty dish. But considering its irresistible nature and your current physical state, who really cares?


“The Morning-After Spaghetti Scramble”

. 4 strips thick-cut bacon, cooked and crumbled
. ¼ pound spaghetti, or other long pasta
. 2 large eggs, lightly whisked
. 2 tbsp heavy cream
. 2 tablespoons butter
. Grated parmesan, mozzarella, or cheddar for topping

. Cook bacon in microwave according to package directions, set aside
. Cook spaghetti until al dente, drain, and transfer it to a large skillet
. On medium heat, immediately add whisked eggs and cream, tossing with pasta to coat
. Add butter and bacon bits, mixing thoroughly for 30 seconds, allowing some of the egg to scramble (the egg that doesn’t will create a smooth coating for the pasta)
. Quickly transfer spaghetti mixture to a bowl, topping with grated cheese
. Serve immediately, accompanied by a side of aspirin and tall glass of water

(Cook’s note: Don’t bother saving leftovers if there are any: this dish is best eaten straight out of the skillet.)